Why am I not writing? (Stop Guilt-tripping)

WHY AM I NOT WRITING? (STOP GUILT-TRIPPING)

BY SULEIMAN NDORO JNR (DR AUDI)

“I should write something this week,” I said to myself as I was enjoying the beautiful scenery of Kwale. I was in a bus travelling to Ukunda from Kwale town to exchange my book, The Secrets, for money with one lady who had ordered it.

Hours later, I had no idea of what I wanted to write. I was guilty that I had stayed for long without updating my blog. I said to myself again, “I ought to write. I have to write.”

Little did I know that I was guilt-tripping. There was nothing positive that would come out from as long as I was guilt-tripping. You must be wondering what guilt-tripping is, yeah? Let me tell you how guilt occurs.

For instance, have you ever stayed long without talking to someone and started developing a ‘feeling’ inside you? The statements that you make become: I should call her. I ought to call him. I must call him. I have to call her.

What next? After that, you start criticizing yourself.

That’s guilt. Guilt happens when you think words such as should, ought to, have to, must. The bad thing with these words is that they create a resistance. Why? Because as soon as you feel like you should do something, you create an internal resistance to doing it.

But what then made me write? It’s nothing big. I just changed my statements from guilt-tripping and criticizing myself to positive statements that would coach me.

I said, “I want to write. It is in my best interest to write this today.” Here you are reading this article.

You will be more effective if you replace guilt-tripping with phrases such as I want to…It supports my goals to…It would be smart to…It’s in my best interest to…

 

It may seem so simple but such positive statements play a big role in making us successful in life. Guilt is one of the emotional barriers to success.  As Jack Canfield says, “Guilt is never productive.”

Suleiman Ndoro Jnr (Dr Audi) is a medical and motivational author with The Secrets being his latest motivational book. He is an entrepreneur (Founder & CEO of Medwax Corporation Africa), co-founder and the Vice President of Kwale Pen People.

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